LesbianFamily.org » Liza

Bi-weekly question: Advice to my old self

Liza — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 22:20:53 +0000

Thank you to everyone who responded to the last questions. Since, again, this is a great place to learn from one another, this post’s question is:

If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself (and/or your partner) upon starting your journey to have a child? Please answer reguardless of whether your journey was via TTC or adoption or other.

Why It Makes Me Happy to be Out

Liza — Fri, 30 Nov 2007 10:25:12 +0000

Yesterday, I had an appointment at the Reproductive Endocrinologist’s office, to see how my progesterone level is here in my “two week wait.” (Answer: Fair, here are some pills.)

The receptionist/billing specialist is a charming 50-something, and we generally get chatty while I’m checking in or out.

This morning, our chatting came around to why we stay here, instead of moving to Wisconsin to be closer to my family.

“Here, we’ve been able to have my partner legally adopt our son as his second parent. There, we wouldn’t be able to — there’s a bad state Supreme Court decision.”

As universally happens, she expressed surprise that the legal environment was better here.

“Here, the law is silent on the subject. So some judges, in the two main metro area counties, will do it. Others won’t.”

Our chat continued as she expressed surprise about the law being so unclear, and I found myself telling her the whole nightmarish saga of our petition having been assigned to the 1 judge in our county (out of 10) who won’t grant them, and how we had to move to the adjacent county. And how that meant spending down all of our non-retirement savings, but thank God we had that option.

Of course I also added that we better hope I was pregnant, because if we have to move on to IVF, we won’t be able to afford to do another whole move like that if we hit the rotten judge lottery again. She laughed and agreed and insisted that I’m already pregnant.

My point is that this kind of conversation makes a difference, even when we’re having it with someone who is already an ally.

She probably went home and chatted with her husband about the conversation we had, and the next time someone in her life voices an ignorant opinion about same sex marriage, she doesn’t just have a philosophical disagreement. She has a concrete, real-life example of discrimination, and a human story that she can share.

I think those human stories make enormously more difference than any abstract opinion, however well reasoned, can make.

(Late) Picture of the Week, 10/27

Liza — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 16:57:42 +0000

How can you not love these expressions?

Picture of the Week, 10/18/2007

Liza — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 15:28:32 +0000

Doesn’t this picture make you miss summer? And want to take a beach vacation right now? We’re in drought hell, but it’s gray and foggy here, and I seriously wish I were whereever the Round family was:

Picture of the Week, October 11

Liza — Fri, 12 Oct 2007 01:08:45 +0000

Happy National Coming Out Day!

I love the energy and exuberance of this image.

Photo of the Week, October 4, 2007

Liza — Thu, 04 Oct 2007 07:05:30 +0000

UPDATE: Check out the Great Virtual Breast Fest in support of nursing moms, at the League of Maternal Justice. Tomorrow, 10/10, at 10am, they are having a virtual nurse-a-thon, and they also have a cool photo montage up at YouTube.

In recognition of Facebook’s poor decision that breastfeeding pictures are obscene, that’s the subject of today’s Photo of the Week:

Picture of the Week, 9/27/2007

Liza — Thu, 27 Sep 2007 13:36:05 +0000

Picture of the Week, 9/20/2007

Liza — Thu, 20 Sep 2007 08:14:51 +0000

Can you say “Happy Family”???

I knew you could!

Picture of the Week, 9/13/2007

Liza — Thu, 13 Sep 2007 08:47:28 +0000

How cute is this?

By the way, some of you who were early regular contributors to the Family Album are still putting your fabulous pictures on Flickr, but not adding them to the LesbianFamily.org set. Come back! We miss you!

Picture of the Week, 9/6/2007

Liza — Thu, 06 Sep 2007 11:22:35 +0000

Happy Labor Day to all the Babas and Mamas and the women and children and men and families and friends of the family who love them.